Today at work while talking to my co-worker we both realized at the same time that last year I had a one night stand with his roommate and he was in the living room drinking coffee when I did the walk of shame. YAY.
You don't understand, Single Ladies is like the Don't Stop Believing of the gay community.
I need to stop researching the drugs I do on Wikipedia. The parts about abuse and dependency hit too close to home
tonight lets celebrate not being married
doing a bong hit while wearing crest white strips...not such a great idea...
I almost punched the night nurse in her face. I woke up and she was standing over me.
I puked in the revolving door and had to sit down on the escalator. That hungover. It's safe to say people are judging me.
Who was that guy I met at your brother's house who had to get stitches in his ass?
you can hold your grudge or you can accept the alcoholic treats as a peace offering. your choice
peace be with you.
At least he's enough of a gentleman to not make me do the walk of shame dressed as Santa.
in a last ditch attempt to make life awkward after i die today i want to be buried naked and have an open casket funeral.
So his roommate walked in on us, went upstairs to tell her bf she has found a new use for the rafters & they must try it.
valentines day is a day for loved ones to share. So me and my vibrator. Happy holidays.
I'm bonding with your girlfriend. I like her. We're plotting your demise.
I just had drunken sex with an eagle scout behind the boy scouts of america building. what has my life come to?!
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