I accidentally had sex with my boyfriend's twin last night...and he didn't stop me.
How was it?
Fantastic, but that's not the point.
apparently he was unaware pussies come in unshaved form. curse you redtube and your unholy lies
I gurantee you I'll be the only one dressed as a giraffe.
you should be careful. everyone knows your chances of pregnancy increase by 100 percent when youre the daughter of a religious figure
He went down on me while I had rollers in my hair. I've never felt more like a lady.
This weekend has taught me that sometimes, being buried under a mattress is the safest place in the room.
No. More. Tequila. Even the hot dog guy felt bad for me and you know that guy has seen some crazy shit.
HE TRIED TO HIT ME WITH A CHAIR. Stoned video games are NOT happening again
Just saw a couple chasing each other on lawn mowers. Oh South Knoxville.
I think if you have sex on the couch it will psychologically damage it.
Never go drinking with anime club. End of story.
Hungover. No words. Just memes.
do you think mom is upset that i left with the stripper from her bachelorette party last night?
alright well you definitely hurt his feelings though you told him he looked like he was going to an Amish community prayer meeting..
You have ten minutes starting with this message to get here. Or I'm putting my clothes back on.
Randomize