Do ugly people know they are ugly?
The quiet ones do.
i just realized that fran drescher is the 90's version of a guidette.
making my second box of kraft dinner for the day. thinking about telling him how much you cheat on him so that you end up having to spend valentines day with me. i'm sorry its every man for himself.
I tried...failed..now im naked on the futon since clothes are hard.
I feel like I have two modes: Super fuckin high, or super giddy from caffeine. I have learned to accept this.
Thanks be to the Goddess of Whores!! I straightened my bed before Ken got here. Found Calvin's boxers in the sheets!!!!
That money I left you should go to the stripper that fell asleep in your bed. Sorry
I think the last straw was when you put on ice skates to go across the waxed wooden floor.
So we stayed at his mom's and all got drunk and he and I hooked up in his old bedroom. Then his drunk mom came in and tackled us when we were still naked. Why does this keep happening to me?
You wanted to go find him and we told you to sit down cause you kept stumbling. You yelled " I CAN STAND!! It's the walking part I can't figure out!"
Fuckin' raining men in my bedroom while I'm trying to drunk eat a rather large portion of pasta. Like shoo I already picked who I'm sleeping with. Pasta wins.
Doing a small happy dance cause my cocaine successfully went through airport security
We are so on opposite sides of the boobs spectrum
Just wanted to share my unfortunate vagina news in the hopes that it would make your vagina feel better about itself.
He's got a big dick, a steady job and tells me I'm pretty. There is litterally nothing else I look for I a guy.
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