I feel miserable, can't drink that much when I go out
We've been saying that since '98
Shaq going to Cleveland; Vince Carter to the Magic; Michael Jackson, Farrah Fawcett, and Ed McMahon die.... ARMAGEDDON IS UPON US!!!!!
How come ATM is perfectly acceptable, yet not washing your hands after you poo is socially reprehensible?
I sat down with you and helped you write your will last night. I was THAT convinced that you weren't waking up.
I've spent more money on drugs for bonnaroo than my actual ticket. Proudly.
I am thinkingif I am doing snow Angels in your living room, I probably had too much to drink
Wtf just happened. Thought you were in my bed since 3am, turned out I was sharing it w/a drunk girl from the 6th floor lounge...
he just sat there, in the doorway of my dorm room, chuggin a fifth like nobodys buisness.. don't know whether to fuck him or be afraid of his confidence
last night we were hooking up when all the sudden he just murmured "mm blonde". i don't know what to think about this situation.
Just realized Ive never seen my f buddy in the daylight. What if he looks different?
You were carrying a 6 ft lamp that we stole on your back yelling "OHANA MEANS FAMILY AND FAMILY MEANS NOBODY GETS LEFT BEHIND"
YOU BROUGHT HANDCUFFS TO THE WHITE ELEPHANT EXCHANGE AND DIDN'T TELL ME???
I just watched some kid bang his girlfriend and I was like whatever I'll just sit here and do all your fucking drugs that's fine
Well, I like big penises but it's not like he walks around with it out or anything so yes I think he has beautiful eyes
i just really want to fuck a guy wearing lederhosen
it'll be sexier than it sounds, i promise
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