I bet he comes in French.
my sex list reads like a who's who of mcdonald's general managers
I'm more concerned as to why he has a playlist entitled Dem Club Beats.
I'm wearing this super skanky ass dress that's wayyy to slutty for church but I think Jesus will appreciate it because i look so bangin for his bday.
Totally forgot this... How weird was it when they were licking our faces
I feel like I just need to fuck him after all his effort. like a "hey man good try" like those kids who get last place and still get a trophy.
there's a liquor store near my therapist
i might give it a shot.
I officially became the girl who let a guy get her off under the covers last night while her roommate and a friend were there. He was impressed by my ability to stay quiet and stay relatively focused on the conversation...
I am so ashamed of you, and yet so proud.
Sounds good! I plan on writing a book entitled: I've Probably Done Cocaine In Your Bathroom. A tell-all by Lauren.
I may have just serenaded the sadface couple sitting on a bench outside the dorm by singing Bye Bye Bye.
you should have walked with me to my car. you just missed a girl rip off her bra and throw it into a dumpster and scream mardi gras
I'm running late...how do you explain period shits to your boss?
Oh Jesus our whore days are numbered
He propositioned me for a threesome once so yeah I'd say he has what it takes to run for public office
Snorted a dorito chip for 1$. Cross that off the bucket list.
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