I wanna bring you to show and tell
I just woke up to a lawnchair covered in lipstick. I'm wearing red lipstick. What happened and is the tequila?
Listen, I'm 30. If it doesnt involve a super soaker and some chicken wings, you can count me out.
We need somewhere to take these girls. Otherwise it's a orgy in the Mazda.
There's a 24 hour period after giving head where you can't eat penis shaped food without me laughing at you
you said you wanted to feel how much my penis weighed for educational purposes
She drove all the way from Austin to have sex with me. I think it's a safe assumption my dick will have an easy life in college.
After she saw a msg in his phone from me that listed the reasons why I love his cock, I don't think I can deny fucking her ex.
Just for future reference, me asking if you're free, followed by a winking face is not my way of suggesting a tandem bike ride.
I mean, he drove your car and it burst into flames, if anyone cant be trusted, it's him.
Gotta wait until my full time offer is confirmed before I try to fuck the mid level manager
It's really hard to masturbate now that I live with girls who actually function before 11 am.
Fine I'll cuddle you but only for the purpose of trying to survive
Smoking weed with a blind guy, don't worry he's chill.
Didn't know my clit could produce that many orgasms in one night. Fuck my husband; think I might have to become a lesbian.
Randomize
