I would kind of like a job that starts at 10:30 and i'll work til 7. I'm not very productive in the morning. My main focus is not puking from 9-11.
My roommate just got home. Made an entire package of bacon. Ate it. And then went to bed.
Got robbed by knifepoint. Then got sympathy Bj. I might have to walk down Austin ave drunk every weekend
Just did a keg stand the dropped my phone in the toilet. Sorry for partying.
You did a keg stand on the toilet?!
I haven't even booked my flights yet and I have my drug supply sorted
So if I get kidnapped from my office and go missing for a few days does that count against my vacation days and do I still get paid?
Walk of shame: Easter Edition. He is risen.
Are there any plans to where i might need to be dressed semi-nicely or is it a "pants optional" weekend?
I thanked him for the booty call offer but told him I'd rather just do it myself
too bad we didn't bet. my 38-1 tears would have made great lubrication for a blow job.
Well, I told him that it's not all about him. Then I gave him the best blow-job in the history of blow-jobs.
I went to watch porn and there's already 3 Santa videos. Happy November 1st.
Woke up from a black out in a strangers Jeep without phone, shoes, or wallet.
That was before I lit my hair on fire
Bro I rebuilt the dungeon in animal crossing visit me
Broooo
Randomize
