I'm in a strip club that reminds me of a crack house from the 80's.
come over
yeah sure
wait who is this again? my contacts got deleted...but tell me and ill be there in 10
after we finished, she said she had been a backup performer for Cirque du Soleil. THAT flexible.
I've been thinking about it and if we ever have a threesome it'll start off with us clothed solely in our matching fur vests
We eventually get in a cab (after david tried to hail multiple regular cars and some sort of shuttle bus)
Oh my god. I'm sorry if i peed on you last nite. I am truly disgusting
but im not going to tell the owner of the penis of my dreams how to wear his hair.
And i'll likely end up sleeping in a bush wrapped up in my poncho
Slutty summer 2013 has officially started. I did accidentally bite a dick though.
I smelled him yesterday and almost relapsed he's like cocaine
"This must be what Jayden Smith feels like all the time"
Hey, how are you?
No. You're dead to me, you hamster stealing slutbag.
His favorite positions involve choking me out. I'm marrying him.
Nothing personal but yes I would be suspicious If I saw 3 guys and 2 girls in the same bathroom stall together
The guy in the cage next to me is having phone sex. His girlfriend is in College Library. Why is my life ridiculous.
Randomize