Rescue me. My white trash great uncle just pulled out his belly at the restaurant to show us how big this woman's tit was
a guy in a toll booth on I-90 told me to fuck off for not being a red sox fan. i am going to miss massachusetts very much.
i cant be the least bit upset about his new gf cause all i think is that she has to put things in his ass
it's like i can feel the ghost of his dick still inside me
If we don't get kicked out of this hotel tonight for fucking too loud we're breaking up
Like. I probably should fuck him. I owe him for breaking his thumb.
I'm ultimately at thr Shariton to drink and ppssibly puke on fancy shit. Thats my story and Im sticking to it.
I feel like a color. Like a wavy color
So you're saying you don't want to be with her anymore because she likes sex to much and is just to hot?
Well when you say it that way it makes me sound like an idiot.
You are an idiot.
How many ballsacks did you see last night because I saw eight
YO CONGRATULATIONS ON YOUR MÉNAGE À TROIS. YOU GO, GLENN COCO
You tried to order fondue take-out.
From Taco Bell.
National champion athletes like gay butt sex, too. I'm just here to help them out.
I woke up and saw that my last google search was "Bacon neck".
As much as I hate to admit it, some day ill need a man because I can't open jars myself and you can't 69 a dildo
Like I don't even know how to respond to this?
Randomize
