don't you miss dr. quinn: medicine woman? i do.
Hungover Fun Fact #4: Eating a grilled stuffed burrito WILL make you blow chunks in the ice maker at work.
I have a sudden craving for National Treasure 2. THIS IS WHY DRUGS ARE AWESOME
She told me she's going to buy a projector so she can watch porn on her ceiling...I'm telling you man this chick is going places
Ive decided I'm sending thank you notes to all the bars for graduation.
hr gave me pretxwk salad and a doubke shot of grey goose. i approve! tou guys are a beautidil couple.
just walked past the recycling bin in class, there's keystone cans in it. go cougs.
He's the second guy this morning whose job is jeopardized because of my vagina.
mate, my mother watched me threw up out of my nose wearing only a g-string.
its just been over 12 hours, and i`m dying, don`t know how i`m supposed to survive the holidays sexless
I found three vicadin and a pint of fireball with the note. In case of emergency drink me under their sink.
He was just lying in his underwear like a present. I had to unwrap it.
No amount of beer will make me feel better about this. It's time for Emergency Whisky
Yeah apparently i called the bartender a "fucking prison warden" after she took my keys and called me a cab
Theres just something about today that says lets get drunk, dont you think?
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