What I'm saying is Afghanistan is America's sexually contracted disease.
She just sent me a picture of a heart. I need to stop fucking freshman...
marching band practice is quite the interesting soundtrack to sex
Ok a condom literally fell out of my underwear this morning, i have never been so confused.
Going to get tested monday. You're coming with. Bonding time, slut style.
He thinks MY vagina is tight. That's saying something.
there was this guy running across campus barefoot in the pouring rain stepping in all the puddles. i want his life. and i want to be stripper.
I think we can all look back on last night and categorize it under, " reason why Cory can't be left at the bar by himself"
I can't wait. Forget the royal wedding. This is the most anticipated hookup of 2011.
He blacked out at the first bar and passed out at the second...we just carried him to bar three and four and sat him in the lounge chairs, he said we're amazing
Dad stumbling and puking in the White Castle parking lot = Father's Day success
I went by my nickname in rehab. It made it feel more like summer camp.
I don't need to know how horny your mother is, hun.
As much as my throat was opened up this weekend, you'd think I wouldn't nearly choke on a damn almond.
Like bruh, I’m a free range girlfriend
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