Kiss
Puke
Afterall, it is the real San Francisco treat
I just bought a vibrating toothbrush with my parents FSA insurance card because I'm too broke for a vibrator. New.Level.Of.Low.
She was that classic mixture between "Hell no" and "Why the fuck not."
we're on our way back. she tried to pants the waiter again.
woke up with the dennys waiters MYSPACE link on the back of my receipt...yep one of those nights
Apparently it is frowned upon to ask the bouncer to stop pointing his flashlight in your face and step back so you can puke....and then do it
Repeat. Dildo on the ceiling, confiscated potato shooter, and bottle of yegger. Repeat. Ceiling dildo and yegger.
Guess who figured out you can fit an entire bottle of champagne in a big Subway cup. Open container laws my ass.
In the middle of our bar crawl last night we stopped to pet dogs at a dog park. who would let a drunk person bet play with their dog???
You know i love you, but i just cannot fuck you until your eyebrow grows back. It's too hard not to laugh.
His dick isn't even good enough to be this much of an asshole
You can't just drop that I might be walking into a foursome and leave it at that
Did you wake up next to Karina?
So that's her name
I was in line at Panera when I got the pic you sent to your coworker. I just showed your vag to a soccer mom. The vibrator was a nice touch.
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