Say my name once during sex just to fuck with her. Like when it gets rough.
no one is going to fuck you in a field of bunnies
I told him to go down on me and when he did he started crying!! I asked him why and he said my vag looked just like his ex girlfriends!!!
I no longer question where these bruises come from... between the strip pole in the living room, the slipnslide in the hallway and our constant level of intoxication I will always be bruised...
putting weed in the twinkies box was possibly the best idea you've ever had
I came out, you were peeing on the car and when I asked why you said it deserved it because its a rental
But today feels so special with katie getting herpes and me cleaning my room. Good things are happening.
You passed out while holding my hair during a blow job.. i think your gona have to earn back blow jobs
She puked her nose ring out of her face.
Is it bad if one of my goals right now is to snort blow through a licorice?
Don't answer that. It is bad.
The smell came through my closed door. His farts are made of rendered tires, and apparently, ghosts.
You were mean to me and you broke my heart and hurt my feelings. You dont get to talk to me about Peter Dinklage
Well I've always wanted to get head while playing WoW...
K I'll do it, but mine is going to be WAY weirder. Your not allergic to shellfish, right?
Btw that $18 I gave you to run around outside naked came out of your wallet.
Could’ve gone my whole life not seeing a man snort coke off another man’s cock... but there it is...
Randomize