A joint and a Nerds Rope = breakfast of champions for the unemployed
Dude, I couldnt get it up cause she said her parents were home...
ok, come over...I have doritos
I woke up this morning next to some guy. I was horrified, he woke up and said, "the white tiger strikes again!"
people would bow to what i just did to her vagina
I like the name aiden. he likes stella. I told him they're coming out of my vagina, and I will name them what I damn well please. Stella goes.
dude my grandmas the shit. she has a sixth grade education and got hit by a car when she was 18. she cant smell.
I believe that I finger-banged my way to the top of the corporate ladder.
I thought all girls wanted is to get a boner
you want to re-phrase that?
U handed him a box of flavored condoms, winked, and slurred, "grape juice is her favorite."
She peed in the limo. She stood up and pulled up her dress and peed on the floor of the limo.
i just snorted adderall with my patient's rolled up EKG strip from our last clinical. nursing school has ruined me. thought you would appreciate this.
Also, sex on a first date is no, right? Really, I just don't want to clean my apartment, but I'm trying to hide behind "morals" in an effort to appear less lazy.
Do you still speak french? one of two girls I woke up with only speaks french...
Settled one third of the tab. Am going back for sex. Love you, make friends
So... How much of our rent is drug money?
Randomize
