listening to techno makes your hand move faster while masterbating
he asked me to hangout with him...and his son
I just went to pick up my pigeon from your house. You should be getting a picture soon
He didn't dress up but kept finding random pieces of costumes on the floor at each club. He was an 80s hair band warrior at the end of the night.
History professor is at the bar. Hurry! There's only so many A's he could give before it starts to look bad.
I want to lick his teeth again. Is that a creepy thing to say?
Was in the middle of a keg stand, the frat guys dropped me, and I broke my nose. My mom didn't enjoy that call from the hospital.
All I want is a guy who will love me and occasionally shave my balls.
I am sending my doctor an XXXMas card thanking him for my tits!
Aside from the possibility of pregnancy, I'm going to call last night a raging success.
Munching saltines, sippin Gatorade, and trying not to get eaten by this small horse
Good morning! Or after noon. Sorry for falling asleep in you
May I the honors of taking your dick tonight?
The honor would be all mine.
Did you mark a random day on my calendar as National Seth Day?
Sounds like a legit day to me.
He bent me in ways I couldn't imagine.. and im a gymnast.
Randomize
