I know it's VERY late and i know i may have burdened you, but on the chance that it's sat nite- are you up or willing to be? Christinas camping and i'm chillin alone.
So I just watched the Lakers/Magic game so I could have something to talk about with him after we have sex this time
I just want you to know that were having pizza delivered to the emergency room
The other night after we fucked we talked about Lowe's vision insurance. Never fuck a coworker.
I fucked her and then she made me sleep on the floor next to her bed because she 'has a committment problem'
Are you having sex right now? Or is the apt just swaying rhythmically on its own? Either way, awesome.
Just had the best random sex ever with a girl I picked up from a pro choice rally uptown. God bless the Democratic National Convention.
im going to hold it over his head for all of eternity. when his children are born i am going to go to the hospital as his wife is giving birth and shove the picture in the childs face, so the first time they see their father is in a drunken stupor looking like a jackass.
i cant believe we used adam and eve as a sexting theme last night
I mean I want to go somewhere. I just don't want to put on pants or behave.
I just got a free round of shots. Don't you DARE fuckin tell me that A-cup boobs can't get you good things.
When confronted with a choice of going home or fucking the band ALWAYS FUCK THE BAND!!
i'll talk to you in three hours when you've stopped foaming at the mouth and your eyes have rolled back into place
On a scale of one to 10 how Risky is it to sleep with a married man (all morals set aside)
I know you would never do it--but if I ever walk into your house and find a "live love laugh" ANYTHING, I will commit you to an asylum. If it is a vinyl decal adhered to the wall, I will just smother you myself.
Randomize