Princeton has an emergency contraception worldwide website. It is in moments like these that I love my university
Ran into him today. He apologized via facebook. sometimes I hate our generation
I just got a facebook invite to join a group called "bring back the old franzia spout." i never want our generation to grow up.
we could easily be the first people to smoke 3 bowls and pound a Four Loco before goin on a tour of the Tillamook cheese factory
Yeah, I wouldn't mind getting fingered in the corner of a dive bar again.
Uuh, dude you came running out of the bar screaming you didn't want to hear that song, ran face first into a truck, spun around 3 times and hit the sidewalk. I tried to catch you.
it's just one of those nights where i don't care if anyone sees my vagina
Yeah it'll definitely be worth it. Not having syphilis all the time you know
Remember that night I drank a bunch of vodka, pounded your Jameson because 'you were a pussy', punched you in the face and ran off as fast as my high heels could go? It was just my Russian and Irish sides fighting for genetic dominance
Matt says that there are strip club auditions in our living room and he'd like you to audition.
The cop used the word "belligerent" 16 times in the report. You get to bail him this time. I'm not up for it.
He is such a generous lover, I can look past the fact his name is fucking Bob.
I'm in his bed with no pants on and he's just eating a sloppy joe
There needs to be a greeting card for "I miss having sex and smoking weed with you."
My vagina! What have you done to it?
Blessed it my child.
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