Thats my favorite, when ex girlfriends become XL ex girlfriends
How do you get eyebrow wax out of your butthole region?
The fact that you aren't ashamed to ask that is the reason I will give you the answer. Under the sink there is a bottle of wax remover. Throw my waxing kit away as well.
im not picky. i just want someone whod go down on me while im writing my psych midterm paper. thats not a lot to ask.
The only thing that makes me want to stop the affair is that I am the Monica Lewinksy in this triangle.
Screw this I'm going to go talk to her. If you hear sirens they're for me.
I woke up naked, with the lights on, using my backpack as a pillow and a pillow as a blanket.
Well it's official... The first guy I ever gave head to now holds 2 world records. Should I text him asking if I can try and break my record?
Bought asot tix too. After Saturday I'm gonna be reborn like Jesus and no drugs until edc
An hour is enough time for me to get drunk and win a dry hump marathon so I hope you have somewhat similar or better goals
Just had sex to Jesse & the Rippers. Can check that one off the bucket list.
Good to know. If our sexting moves past early 1900s vernacular, I'll be sure to use that once or twice.
I just feel like if we dated, he'd just be crying the entire relationship
Did anyone see us fucking last night on the giant turtle outside downtown Disney?
Other than the whole stab wound in my leg thing, today was pretty good. The nurses all loved me and gave me a sandwich and juice.
Had to claim I'd "gone lesbian" to get my cat back. Thank God I got away from that one.
Randomize