They keep asking what you are doing. I told them to quit calling her "what."
why would she put his p in her m after it was in her a? that's gross
its gross she let him put his p in her a nevermind his p in her m after p in her v. cleaning up is necessary
i put my m on your v after my p was in your v. no big deal
There's people holding up abortion signs everywhere. I guess the people of Florida want you to remember you fucked up on Spring Break.
I would like to apologize for making you the target of my "I wish head hair grew as fast as Pubes speech" the other night
He was able to grab love handles during doggy style... I know we said spring break mexico diet starts next week but i think we need to start tomorrow.
The doctor asked me what height I fell from to hurt my back.. I answered keg height
Nice. I ate a jello shot out of a bovine blow up doll's love hole last night
On the oral sex Super Bowl board I drew 7 and 1. If I get lucky, someone will be swallowing during Madonna's half time. I'm sure she'd approve.
We hotboxed his closet and accidentally lit some of his shirts on fire... do we have a fire extinguisher?
You mistakenly try to piss in a cactus bush ONE TIME and are forever dubbed cactus ass
The problem is that you are trying to hold on to some dignity. Let it go. I hope your rash gets better.
Why do all the Father's Day cards talk about what a great dad they are? Why can't there be one that says something like "Thanks for sticking it to mom and making me possible, your sperm was appreciated."
Another guy on Tinder just asked about "the hotter girl" in my pictures. I fucking hate being your friend.
So he cheated on his gf again. For the third time. Second time with me. HE CRIED WHILE DRIVING ME HOME BECAUSE HE CHEATED ON HER. And I laughed the entire way. Good god I'm an asshole.
Dude, Kevin called the cops on the cops.
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