Hahahaha do you think bella ever gave edward head?
I can feel you judging me through the phone.
she gave me one of her senior pics and told me specifically to give it to you. In other words she still wants to suck your dick.
Its alot easier to hide alcohol when your wearing a toga..
everythings easier when your wearing a toga.
Seriously? Time stamp. 2:31 AM. And I am taking self potraits with a tree. Betty Ford anyone?
He just helps fat girls get exercise. One walk of shame at a time.
he broke into my appartment and left me a waffle maker...
We can see it once so I can see the whole movie, then I'll go see it with him so I know when the boring parts are and I can have sex with him during those parts
His penis has been a bonding mechanism beyond comparison.
I'm convinced that the Christmas lights in my room contributed to the great sex.
It was just a Craigslist hook up but she wore sweats. Where are the girls with class?
He yelled "HOO-ah!" like Al Pacino when he pulled down his pants. Trust me, he has every right to.
He made a playlist to use during sex...that ended with The Ultimate Warrior's entrance music.
Today I learned I and my bar naps were the subject of a bar meeting.
When God made him he put all his talent in his dick. What he lacks in brain, he makes up for in loin.
Randomize
