We got so high yesterday we tried watching soccer
47 days without vaginal penetration. Im pretty sure it's grown over.
Do you realize that if your cunt was a missing person it would be assumed dead?
Pretty much knew it was gonna be awful when the extra condoms she had from her ex were entirely too big for my dick
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
you were sitting on your bed looking out the window, rocking back and forth naked, saying how peaceful it looked outside
explain the broken jalepenos in my underwear drawer?
Not sure if it is a new high or new low, but i left a basket on the porch of the sorority I woke up at. It had a description of the Minnie Mouse I woke up next to, and Plan B.
My roommate said I banged on the wall and said, "this dude eats pussy like a champ."
So I think my aunt and her one legged boyfriend are getting it on in the next room. Traumatized does not even begin to describe what I am right now
I feel like Jeremy snapchattong while we're fucking is a perfect example of our generation..
She mentions her boyfriend one more time, I'm taking her home and breaking that shit up.
you licked my face then when I finally got you to the bathroom, mid puke you said you liked the taste of my foundation.....you weren't drunk at all....
you asked the cab driver if he wanted to meet your parents, last night.
I said I wanted pizza tattoo on my ass and the tattooist asked me what I wanted on it.
Why were there just 3 inflatable bounce houses delivered to my house?
oh shit.
Randomize
