okay I'm thinking he doens't have a facebook...I'm on page 28 of Hunters
ok you need to stop NOW
All my problems are solved. I just got McDonalds and scratch off lottery tickets.
What did you even date her?
because emotionally unstable girls are great in bed.
so I smoked with the leasing agent of the apartment complex. Of corse I am going to take this one
Nothing says Happy Thanksgiving like having to pee in a condom for my cousin so that he can pass a drug test.
chatroulette drinking game turned into a foursome.
We've only been driving for two hours and I'm already down 3 vicodin...I'm not going to survive this family vacation.
Btw, just wanna point out that you've hooked up with two guys whose birthdays are today. Congratulations, you have a type!
I just laid my head on this pillow and I smelt your penis. It was comforting.
i get drunk faster, i spend less money on food, and i'm losing a shit ton of weight. depression and its pills are doing wonders for me
You know how I know she's ugly? 97% of her profile pics are flowers or animals. And what do we know about pretty people and the Internet?
Find me a cup with a lid so I can illegally drink in your car. I'll be there in bout 10 minutes.
so, i guess i gotta chill on showing up to work hungover... someone anonymously left a bible in my work mailbox (no one else got one)
Its not something you can force it it just has to happen like a rainbow or pooping
I told him to take his man panties off and take the fucking Jaeger bomb already, so no to a 2nd date
Randomize
