Of course we end up in a gay bar... And I have to tell you there are some hot dudes here, should I pass around your Facebook?
I found somebody to have a 3 sum with
shutup! Who?!?
Hahaha April fools!
How was your Memorial Day?
Don't remember... but I do have an American flag painted on my boob signed by a Staff Sargent... Oh God, I hope that's his military rank and not a nick name.
ron's 8" boning knife is for sale. oh and it comes with a flavor injector.
High?
hahahahaha turkey breast
oh great. kentucky is ranked #1 in the country for child abuse. go us.
I love seeing the creepers that friend request me outside of facebook. its like seeing a unicorn in the middle of campus.
he got promoted. that means i have now given my new boss chlaymida. i need a new job.
In the middle of getting a blow job, she looked up at me and said "this isn't the first time I've done this today"
Ethically speaking on a scale from 1 to morally wrong, how wrong would it be to give babies ambien? Hypothetically speaking.
she walked out and i tried to get her to come back but i couldn't remember her name so i just whistled... future reference: that doesn't work
Dude. All those hangovers I never had came back with a vengeance. I just opened the door of this car to barf. The car was not motionless. We are on the autobahn.
Grandpa got a dui while riding a horse. This is what I need to live up to.
I'm sitting in front of a fan naked drinking Gatorade. Motherfucking hangover probs
We hooked up last night. I think it was great for our friendship.
FYI telling a guy that you're glad his dick isn't big after giving him a bj, is NOT a compliment.
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