So drunk its hurt
the chick doesn't look like she's put anything in her mouth for weeks other than his dick.
dude do u know what u did last night?
do i wanna know???
you totally walked in on some couple fuckin in their unlocked dorm room asking for directions to ur room...
That guy youre talking to looks like Brian from Family Guy.
You would only drink if the space jam soundtrack was playing, you thought it was hilarious that before every shot you said "y'all ready for this".
watching hot guy on train scrolling with his blackberry's track ball... o to be that track ball...
We uncovered another pile of vomit after you left. And i am not talking about the one in the vase
Lives are in shambles. Livers are in disrepair. Our friend was missing for 2 days. His brother slept in a porta potty. God damn you college world series
I think I'm just going to up-end a bottle of wine and look through pictures of what my life used to be.
Well it's 2pm. Time for another game of "Who, What, Where". The game where you try to guess who this girl is, what happened last night, and where'd your shit go. I'm going for 1/3 today.
That's better than I've done so far.
That works. I won't care. I'll be a mermaid. Mermaids don't give a fuck.
Especially drunk mermaids.
Well I was thinking of taking him out for drinks then lecturing him about his drinking... kind of like an open minded intervention
i was the only bi girl at the frat party. i felt like the last cresent roll at thanksgiving
I have never lost more friends than while playing Uno drunk.
I fucked him on shrooms. His dick looked like a missile and he had snakes coming out of his ears. It. Was. AWESOME!
Randomize
