If its vodka, everyone is attractive. Tequila, everyone is dead sexy, single and fuckable.
i fucked a milf yesterday.
i'm not impressed, in this generation that could technically mean a 16 year old.
There's nothing like vomiting in the restroom at work to remind you that you're not in college anymore.
Yeah. I had to take off my shirt. It's soaked in weakness.
Watermelon juice. Makes everything better. Gin. Wine. EVERYTHING.
i'll llet you know if at any point this night starts to make any sense
No one parties "Full Karen". She once broke a couple up at the bar, ate the girl out in the bathroom and took the guy home.
We ended up on their roof with our pants around our ankles shotgunning beers at one point.
I had a drinkin contest with a person that didnt exsist, fuck withdrawl day
Hold on are you sure that we dont have another roommate?
Yes.
So you'd go straight for a fat chick with cheese on her tits?
IT IS NICKEL SHIT NIGHT
*shot. Why
She tried doing a backflip and ended up doing somersaults down the entire stair case.
you know you're in deep when you watch fear and loathing in las vegas and every damn scene is relatable.
Idk, apparently drinking five Four Loko's and trying to fight a mailbox constitutes disorderly conduct.
I just recommended that the library purchase the first major hentai with tentacle porn. Really, I'm doing everyone a favor.
Randomize
