Define "chronic" masturbator.
her vagina probably looks like a grenade went off in a deli
she had the hairiest bush ive ever seen. it looked like a spoiled head of lettuce.
a chick just tried to cover her fart by sneezing. it didn't work
Girls only wine night turned into a sloppy drunk lesbian orgy again
All semester I have been trying to figure out if this kid in front of me is gay. His cell phone just went off with Britney's "Circus". Case closed.
He walked in, tore open the drawer, pulled out a condom, and slammed it shut. He was that ready.
Meeting relatives from another state drenched in tequila and smelling of weed. I'm gonna kill you for soaking the only bra I brought in Jose Cuervo Gold.
I actually didn't mind her sub-par blowjob skills.. It took me back to a time when skipping class was noticed, and my liver didn't look like a worn out shoe
Any residual attraction has just been ruthlessly murdered by that mustache.
So the TSA can feel me inside and out in front of 40 people, but they catch me fucking in the bathroom 20 feet away and all of a sudden their the decency police
She was chasing her shots with beefaroni and I think I fell in love.
Not a problem, sailor. I speak both autocorrect and typo.
He's very cute and has a totally sit-able face.
We peed on a building I think...like a building in downtown...not out of view of anyone.
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