I'm getting the same feeling waiting for the web-page to load that has my final grades that I get when I take a pregnancy test. I think I'm gonna leave my computer for 3 minutes.
Disregard that. She just puked into her boot and started screaming.
I think im definitely allergic to shell fish. Or hungover. Probably both.
I walked into my room to see them crying, watching hey arnold, and passing a franzia box back and forth...
There were slices of bread pasted to the wall with peanut butter this morning. I don't want to know
I seem to have forgotten that I am wearing a one piece bathing suit under my clothes
I plan on just grabbing someone's dick if I have to. They will know what's up. Why else do you go to a bar alone on valentines day?
we didnt plan anything. just randomly met up in the park, both reached into our pockets and each lit up a joint without exchanging words. we're telepathic potheads.
Some girl came up to us crying that she lost her phone and you said "if it's meant to be, let it be"
Wore a burger king crown while giving head still drunk this morning #blessed
Do you remember when I didn't post that pic of you fucking an avocado on your boss' desk? Can you return the favour?
But what if there are 6 people and they end up just pairing the off into 3 couples. Is it still an orgy?
just had an allergic reaction to my dildo. My life is ruined.
You're a brave, albeit stupid soul for wanting in on the fuckery that comes attached to my vagina
Can we just take a minute to acknowledge that you're drinking with your gay ex boyfriend's DAD who is a DEACON??
Randomize
