Charged a drink to your name last night. Thanks for the whiskey
what are you wearing?
Just my guilt
why does hillary duff have a greatest hits album?
If my boyfriend wants to eat his own jizz after masturbating, what does that make him?
Elton John & Lady Gaga just did a duet on the Grammies. How appropriate. He likes cock & she happens to have one.
there's a picture of him beating off in the library with a cowboy hat. please steer clear of this one if you ever want to be respected.
the "its better than getting an actual virus from an actual porn star" argument failed.
just found glitter in my belly button...seriously when will this nightmare end
In either case, seeing now as it's basically two couples, unless we're planning to have a good old fashion orgy I think this isn't going to work out so well.
Oh, and also, a couple of straight girls showed up. But they ran away.
You've fucked so many I should get a word bank when you make me guess these things.
Also, you should've bet on Team Liver.
We won.
USA USA USA
If I get a 4.0 I am doing SO much cocaine.
We are actually the same person except with opposite genitalia, which are both incredible.
No. You're getting a Viking funeral and I'm pawning your shit.
Randomize
