Did I ever tell you that the first person i made out with cried?
my mouth tastes like poor choices
we should go somewhere reaaaaaal shady
this girl walked outta his room as i was walkin in to scottys and i just say " time for the walk of shame baby! whoooo!". she ran away
the only good thing about him lasting five minutes was that nobody thinks i had sex with him or that im a slut because we were only in the bathroom for five minutes
Didn't get to fuck her. Had to leave abruptly through window. Explain later.
some drunk bitch driving a golf cart ran over the live band... its bad.
Watching crazy stupid love and drinking alone isn't what I thought it was gonna be
Its TONS better. Expect a drunk dial at 11:54
Just realized i left my bra at his house. WHY do i suck at one night stands?!
Some older looking guy gave me his card as he exited the train. Hes a pharmaceutical rep. I'm debating asking him for a job. Obv he wants sex but if I can get a job out of this maybe I can offer him more than a cheap dry handjob bc that's all I'm really up for these days
Yea not today, I ending up taking a shit behind a tree last night.
That's a lot of people she's fucked in one picture.
I love getting kicked out of places. Its like winning a little league game
Besides, I don't need any more men there who have seen my tits. #bearwatch2014
Two words: blizzard sex
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