Far right against the wall..hiding come find me. dont tell oyhers hahaha
It made me feel like I need a reality show of my life so I could go back and watch the episodes to figure out how I got from the trunk of the car to my neighbors tree house...
it's like i warped into dreamland and the only thing that makes sense is my solo cup
please tell me if i'm home and in my bed
negative
come find me please
You know how I told you I don't have many naked pics? Apparently that changed last night.
Phosphoglyceraldehydration... why the fuck is this a word
I wish I could get plan B off e-bay so it would be a secret and cheap.
she has over 3,000 tagged photos on facebook. dont tell me she isnt annoying.
becoming an adult blows. i don't think its possible for me to wake up for anything that doesn't involve kegs and eggs or half naked bums passed out in our yard.
oh good. ive just found out that i went downstairs at 6 am still blacked out and had a 30 minute conversation with my mom about the different ways to feed our dog
I doubt she'll sponsor it. You know alcohol and fireworks don't mix, right?
It's okay. We're not going to soak the fireworks in alcohol. The alcohol is for drinking.
Back of his car in the Starbucks parking lot WITH HIS APRON STILL ON. Check and Mate.
Holy shit. You won barista bingo AND the Triple Crown in one day.
Holy high batman
The hairdryer was like a fuckin obstacle course
Your dog took my vibrator out to the yard
Looking back, we probably shouldn't have chased alcohol with more alcohol
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