Partly cloudy chance of praying to the porcelin gods
Agreed. Everyone should experience a blackout before 3pm in their lifetime.
They're giving me a hotel, and this chick doesn't have a place to stay for the night... I swear this is how real life Porno starts.
I know. I just don't want anything else. I have no other desire. Just a ham sandwich.
I honestly don't know what to make of that.
A ham sandwich would be nice.
They are making fun of natty and blackberries.
Tell them they are ugly.
It wasn't until that morning that I realized I wasn't actually dreaming, finding myself in the bathtub with someone laying on me
ive realized i need to start an "avoid moving in with my parents after graduation" fund
hey, sorry about all the butter. I thought it was gonna help.
On the bright side I still get a $20 referral bonus at the plasma center even though he passed out during donation because he was so high.
Thanks to this cookie, I have now eaten something other than skittles today.
It really went downhill when you started writing IOU on pieces of napkins. Giving them to the strippers
Real life dumb and dumber
I'm seriously considering refraining from drinking on school nights.
I like how you say that with 4 school days left of the school year..
Good morning! So would you prefer me to show up kind of late or on time but looking like I got chewed up and spat out by an episode of Buffy the Vampire Slayer?
Sitting in the car eating a bagel. Watching a guy do tai chi in the parking lot. My morning is fabulous
That was the first time ive ever slept with a girl with a q in her name
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