Thanks for last night it was amazing as always
What are you talking about
You've got to be kidding me
sorry I missed your bday party.,I was vid chatting with that new guy I'm talking to all night...happy biirthday though
If that was your dad, he is hot
A woman in the waiting room at the STD clinic told me that she is going to pray to jesus for my penis.
and people in Baltimore still get a bad wrap.
You called information & said "connect me to johnny depp" when they told u it wasn't listed u said " try depp comma johnny he's expecting my call"
how much land on farmville do you have now? i sold all my shit to make room i need more money... these animals need to know I'm running a business not a charity.
the pub in dfw airport has a countdown timer to st. pattys day, to the second, i like texas
oh, it's pms. I almost cried yesterday bc my roommates didn't seem perky enough when I got home.
you don't know true fear until you are a convinced that velociraptors are trying to kill you through your roof.
EVERY guy that's EVER been in my vagina has texted me tonight for a booty call. Narrow it down to the greatest hits or just work in timeline order?
Realistically anyone can come I don't care it's Boston what do I own boston? No. I just don't want people who are gonna give me "why are you doing that" kinda look when I take birthday shots out of my birthday babe shot glass necklace.
I'm to the point that I've had the revelation that its physically impossible for my arms to be attached to my torso.
If I'm going to risk life and limb to wear a Wings jersey to the Garden next week, the least they can do is win.
And the most would be ending up in bed with one of them.
Opened my notebook to coke all over the pages. So, if that's any indication on how this weekend went.
I think you're my feminist conscience sometimes.
Randomize
