doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
Ambien. No doubt about it.
that cunt stole my fb status. SHE'S NOT THAT FUNNY
I wonder sometimes what your vagina thinks about you.
There was a guy running for some position in our government named "young boozer" hell yes I voted for him
I can't do a walk of shame with a sombrero full of baby chickens
I'm pretty sure we organized our beer pong teams according to who's been circumsized...
I swear to God, if you drunkenly correct my grammar one more time, I'm cutting you off.
Just thinking about this summer makes me feel a slight tingle of an orgasm mixed with a twinge of regret as the cold ghostly feeling of multiple hangovers creep into my body.
I am going to be so excited tomorrow when I find this box of crayons in my purse
Feels like I ran a marathon last night. A tequila marathon.
He called his dick the "gentle giant"
You shouldn't play strip poker when you're having a wet fart kind of day.
He was so drunk we almost didn't even make it to his place because he didn't know where he lived
he’s basically the devil with a fuck boy hair cut and chlamydia
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