addddeeerrraaaallll.
ok i'm not sure if that was a success statement or a cry for help.
Want to have sex later?
This feels like a trap
i need a wealthy benefactor or a cocktail job. or to start stripping. or kill myself. whatever.
Realistically anyone can come I don't care it's Boston what do I own boston? No. I just don't want people who are gonna give me "why are you doing that" kinda look when I take birthday shots out of my birthday babe shot glass necklace.
Hate sex is good. Drunk sex is better. Combine those two however and you get the best experience of your LIFE.
She proposed we share a dildo. Hopefully she was joking.
his daughter has his phone and goesss ohhh boobies and shows me a picture of my own tits...
Her rack rivals that of the deer I shot last season. You need to get after that.
What's the point of bringing a Jack and Coke to work if my boss is just gonna piss and moan about me day drinking again?
i need some magic done to my vagina
I just want someone to put their head on my boobs and laugh at my jokes ....
They need to eat meat, go down on me the first time, every time, and know how to pull my hair. And there's a height requirement for this ride
He showed up on school grounds wearing nothing but a suit of armor. Really at this point I'm more impressed than angry.
the universe is starting to freak me out.. ive now had sex with 3 people who were born on the same day..
it's like my eyeball is being humped by my eyelid
Randomize
