They were so slutty we had to play "rarely have I ever."
every time i recognize a doctor or patient at the hospital on this rotation, i just pray it's not from my blackout saturday makeout slut moments...professionalism shouldn't count on weekends
Well the police had to intervene and I couldn't exactly feel my legs by the end of the night, but I'd say it was a successful Friday night.
I just texted him and asked him to keep some in case I need help sealing the deal.
Girl Scout cookies are like roofies for fat chicks.
i was beyond wasted so he tucked me into bed and wrapped the blankets around me like a burrito. then gave me a bloody mary and an omlet when i woke up. and who says living with your cousin is a bad thing?!
He just kept yelling cup my balls to everyone they kicked us out after 20 min
hahahaha what do we need the kangaroos for? please tell me we release them instead of doves
I'm a drunk white girl and my ancestors were drunk white girls, if we apologized our species would be extinct.
I just found 20 dollars in my vibrator box. Was it a drunken sign to myself to get more?
And you said I'm not athletic, I rubbed one out with my sports band on, it's the same as walking 1/4 mile.
i don't know how to react to you in a diaper crying and calling a football 'sadie'.
Free stuff before I even put his balls in my mouth like wow great start
Clothing is a burden necessitated by propriety.
I'm tired of you and your emotional constipation. WHY DO YOU CLOSE YOUR EYES WHEN WE MAKE LOVE!?
I was supposed to see Marcus tonight and he cancelled. Listen, I shaved my butt hole. Somebody is getting this WAP 😂😂😂😂
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