I just walked through a room full of deaf people and farted i love deaf people
i want tt clbm rinabw nd ride uncrn
what?
i wnt tto climb a rainboww and ride a unicornnnnnnnnn
I got a lot accomplished today, and the day is still young! I built a fort, hot boxed a fort, had a tea party in a fort, and now realizing how high I am.
After the VIP Latina experience at the strip club last night, I am rooting for Mexico in this years World Cup.
Woke up this morning on my couch at 6am fully dressed including heels, holding half a corn dog. I called you last night when I was buying the corn dog from a street vendor, I think.
I am in love with you.
And we should impose a 'friends don't let friends order 25 shots at last call' rule
just got the results back. i love his dick even more now i know its clean
All i remember is Liz dragging me home yelling at me, crying, and barfing
I have a feeling she doesn't appreciate me as a person. She only fucks me because I look like Harry Potter.
I AM TEN TEQUIA SHOOTS ON AND I JUST SAW SOMEONE DO A BODY SHOT OFFF OF JESUS
THIS FEELS SO WROG AND OH SO RIGHT
I just sneezed weed. Kinda wanna try to smoke it.
Wanna play whack-a-mole in my pants?
Your word choices worry me.
He has started theming his dick pics. I have one he sent his duck has a sombrero on. Another a Barbie is riding it.
Giant stained glass jesus is judging my black pleather pants
Sorry dude, one minute I was flirting with a bachelorette party from Dallas and the next I’m being tied to the bed by the bride
Trying to wrangle us an invite to the wedding
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