Midget sex pt 2 tonight
I cant believe we actually had a nipple party!
i just made out with my boyfriends father...and so did jess
So ps i'm not pregnant with any athletes illegitimate children : )
officially spring now- first drug bust of the season across the street.
My ex came to my place while I was gone. Random things he took: snow shoes, my laundry quarters, a decorative picture, all my condiments, the container that held my rice and a sticker off my wallet. Then left a note saying he watered my plants and fed my cats. What. The. Fuck.
Update- I sold my hat to some drunk kid for 50 bucks. I used my earnings to buy beer on the way home. I realize to everyone else seeing me drinking on my balcony at 6am, I look like an alcoholic, but I'm thinking of it as a night cap
If you're in the liquor store 5 minutes before close, and you have to ask the cashier for a coin to flip to make a life decision because "vodka takes you to a bad place," you need to reevaluate your life.
This girl ordered Hershey syrup and red wine and he made it for her
Dude too much vodka. I think I just puked up my heart
That's what you get for taking that guy home. The god of sluttiness is frowning upon you.
Is her dick bigger than yours?
I don't care what the Chinese zodiac calendar says . . . 2015 is the year of the cock!
Family trip though. I generally don't wheel too much ass with the fam in tow. Despite the fact my parents would be pleased if I did.
Saw your dad at the bar last night... And again this morning when he left. Told you not to mess with me bitch.
There are way too many people I have fucked in this class for this not to be awkward
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