So just talked to them hahah i like that people sat there and watched as you two made out... They said they even had to refill their beers
Okay you're seriously so fucking annoying its like having a baby
No, we ended up finding him drunk at a bus stop downtown sitting on the bench asking people for chocolates and amazing stories to "rid his mind of his whore of a girlfriend"
We decided to smoke and then made crosses on our foreheads for ash wednesday
mom would be proud
She came over with Guinness cupcakes, a case of Mickeys, wearing an Ireland flag & nothing else.
He told me the hand job I gave him this morning was "lovely".
I'm gonna need you to NOT let me play duck duck goose with three racoons in the middle of the street next time.
this just proves how much faith i have in "us".. what should we be for halloween..?
Bro, she used the potato bongs to make French fries after. She's deff a keeper.
I got back at him the only way I knew how, by hooking up with the guy he hates from their rival fraternity.
You kept insisting you found queso that's better than oral sex
Netflix, eggnog, and bed? Maybe some hand stuff?
Congrats! Its a fuck boy!
My vagina is very pro this idea
Do you ever look at your life and go "i'm too sober for this bullshit"?
Every day of my life.
Randomize
