he's 25, hott, and leaving for iraq tuesday, i wanna get in as much as possible...
your life is a nick sparks novel waiting to happen
On your way out, lock the front door. And by lock the front door, I mean find the door handle, reattach it, and then lock it.
It was either a cute kinda butch tomgirl or a really fem guy. Either way, I made out with it. Bisexuality, my best friend.
Dude, this chick, who is smokin by the way, has 4 false teeth on top from a softball accident that she can take out if she wants... Who's getting amazing head tonight? This guy!
I don't know whether to be creeped out by the fact this chick can do that, or jealous because you're getting toothless head.
you were sitting on your bed looking out the window, rocking back and forth naked, saying how peaceful it looked outside
Well, there goes the no drunk sex injuries resolution.
Pretty sure I'm taking the break up well. Alcohol made me okay with it and drugs keep me agreeing with why I dumped him in the first place.
I think a kid would responsible me up
I'm playing a lilo and stitch drinking game
Aloha alcoholism.
Her rack rivals that of the deer I shot last season. You need to get after that.
You know just a typical night. Eating peanut butter off of tablespoons and having sex to our favorite Christmas carols. This is my favorite time of year.
Landen experienced Greenville for the first time last night. He was awaken by 2 cops and 4 EMS guys this morning in the bed of that truck that is for sale at the swashbuckler carwash, said he was trying to walk to waffle house... Greenville- 1, Landen- 0
I farted in his bed and then in my drunken stupor grabbed hair defanging spray to cover up the stench.
Btw his name is Woody. I must be really drunk to think this is a good situation
I was "singing along to the Lego Movie" high. Everything was not awesome
Randomize
