It took him longer to undo my bra than he lasted..
Honey, If i waited till marriage I wouldnt know what a dick tasted like.
i justawanted to let you know that illi aalways be thwew for ui and o qill waasag youer dog whenebvet u wsnt
turns out I still hate jay leno...even at 10pm.
I haven't shaved in at least a week, he said "obviously neither one of us was prepared for this"
And i didn't ask you to do that, You showed your penis at your own free will.
whatever. as long as im no longer referred to as the girl who fucked the pledge on his big brother's couch.
check off brunette on the list of girls tht hit me with there cars and then fucked me later
Apparently I'm ahead in the foot race to his dick because I'm not insane. If I'd have known that's all it took, I'd have worn sweat pants more often.
You were chugging tap water out of a running blender screaming "bubbles is Perrier mother fucker"
So I just went to clothing optional bar
So my new thing apparently is getting wasted, showing people my slytherin socks and convincing them I'm slytherin..because why not
I got myself off in the shower last night for the first time ever! I just looked like I was playing a game of twister.
Dude, never piss off a hungover boss.
i’n just gonna forge ahead, gag reflex be DAMNED.
Randomize
