so im watching realhousewives of jersey with my mom. she just said they werent really rich bc they were doing their own makeup.
can we please move this conversation out of my vagina?
You stood in front of a yellow Camaro and kept yelling at it to "Transform already!!!!".. yeah, I'd say you were pretty wasted.
he's wearing our apron and eating a pb and oreo sandwich. and calling the oreos "topless" since he took their tops off...
Thank God I didn't lose my virginity to that asshole. That woulda been like winnin a raffle ticket for a free bag of dog shit. But with like a really pretty bag. A pretty bag full of dog shit.
I drank all the drinks. And jump off roof. Yay
I accidentally lit my hair on fire and we broke the bed. How was your night?
Just keep my face away from hard objects. And by that I do not mean erect penised.... those are totally fine. It's more just things like rocks, table edges, blunt objects, etc so I don't get another concussion.
I got laxative. And a toothbrush. Because who wants to buy just laxative on a Friday night?
I don't understand why you aren't on this trip all I do is smoke weed drink beer and get fingered
I've been on the toilet for an hour. On a six day bender. My ass feels like its leaking vodka
she said she just "wanted a guy who she could cook breakfast for". HUGE MISTAKE. I'm never leaving
I'd just like to inform you. That when I was at bvj the first day I was blackout drunk by noon. Get on past Chelsea's level like now. Do it for present Chelsea
I saved a sauce packet from taco bell that said "Free me" to use in my next break up.
If my dildo had feelings, they. Would've deffinately been hurt. He put that toy to shame..
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