Just boiled hotdogs in bongwater. NOT a good idea.
i got a mint flavored condom from wellness day...im kind of tempted to taste it
you were wandering around the street for like an hour singing "nothing but socks on"..an original you wrote after the 12th shot i believe
Currently doing my walk of shame down a floating dock. No more guys who live on a boat EVER AGAIN
He rode a broom down the stairs while we were mattress surfing. Naked. Buck ass naked. WTF
I hear sloppy seconds go great with fried rice
She flashed them and they let her pay with Monopoly money. I'm married, so it is your obligation as my best man to repeatedly fuck her for me
Im wearing a bra. Made of paint.
Holy sore nipples Batman
You kept ripping all your clothes off and saying, "Let me be free!"
he won't tell me his last name, but I know his garage key code
This is why you have to watch more Zombie movies- to prepare for End Times...
Is it ok to bone a former patient who is also a client? Since it is two negatives does that cancel and become a positive?
I don't know what she did to me last night, but the scratches on my back indicate that I had sex with a Bengal tiger last night.
Nothing like an afternoon walk of shame across campus on parent's weekend. Damn.
Randomize
