what if I'm pregnant?
smusmorshion
Just saw two girls doing a walk of shame together. Slut bonding at it's best.
sometimes you just have to pull up your panties, blow a kiss to the security camera and walk out of the alley like nothing happened.
I am downstairs in the bar now having a beer...actually I ordered two beers and placed one across from me in front of an open chair. I did this for appearance sake, so nobody knew I was double fisting all alone. I'm getting hungry now. I'm thinking of ordering two meals just to keep appearances up.
ur not supposed to find someone to make out with when ur bf takes u to his SISTERS house to hang out with her and her husband
Dude. I knoww what ur thinking. Yes, your hand hurts. It's because you fell through a window. If and when you wake up, go to the hospital.
i was talking to them for like 5 mins and they were like HEY LETS GET A PICTURE and tequila said it was good idea
'twas the night before moms weekend and all were blacked out. Not a coug was sober not even farm house. I was down to fuck but you were not in sight, so I bid pullmania a sweet goodnight.
I'm counting my small victories this morning. For instance, I haven't puked at work yet.
I had to bail out of the tour de Franzia because I have class Saturday morning. Grad school is ruining my life
Blacked in cold and wet, with them areound me singing Aaaaall we are saaaaayiiiing is YOU PEED YOUR PANTS
Oh, btw, UPS might come by. Drunk me ordered us $75 worth of gummy airhead starburst type candies. Whatever it is, it'll be delicious.
Sexting gets boring after a while. I'm eating a sandwich right now and googling 'sexting ideas' and just copy/pasting lines.
It's a good sandwich though.
Last night I made out with two lesbians while dancing with another girl. I'm pretty sure it wasn't even real life.
Dude whoeverrs house this is has only creeam cheese and beer in the fridge. Thats my kinda diet
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