when she was cumming she looked like terri schiavo. it took all of my memorized porn images to not go limp.
Now I'll never know if Megan finds a millionaire.
The best part was her genuine shock and total "I didn't know" look when we said she couldn't cook a steak in a microwave.
Maybe you should go over there and lead him on and reach down his pants like he's about to get some and yank his balls.
That's the best idea I've heard all day.
I just used a coupon while buying plan B. The pregnant sales clerk nodded in approval.
Fuck you. how could you leave me passed out hangin out my truck window when you knew it was starting to rain?
I need to stop drinking and eating and start working out. I look like the lovechild of John Goodman and Jabba the Hutt.
I was the king of the handle race. My team finished it in 56 minutes.
you don't get it. Nobody wins a handle race. there just degrees of losing.
That's actually a fantastic idea... The kinky sex dungeon will be vastly improved by the addition of a lightsaber
he told me it was nice to see me not blacked out mumbling to myself in the front seat, I told him it was nice to see him not in handcuffs.
Every now and then I'll meet one who is talented in the art of shower gymnast.
It's like Jesus got stoned and this would be the sandwiches he'd make
We just catapulted a jelly bean off of his hard dick into his mouth.......Happy Easter!
THIS IS EXACTLY WHY YOU SHOULDA FUCKED BEFORE YOU MADE HIM YOUR BOYFRIEND, CURVED DICKS ARE NOT OK
I Never thought my late 30s would end up with me getting eaten out on a desk in the managers office of a lululemon, but I guess being a franchise owner has its perks!
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