Just got my econometrics book in the mail and started flipping through it. Our Thursday parties may turn into u convincing me not to kill myself.
Charging the asians next door to us $5 a page to print their final papers because theirs broke. Bars close in 2 hours, lets go
the ladder is at the bottom of the pool
i feel like the wall was a canvas for his penis.
...Saturday night. Get your dick ready. We are going to go nuts. I want to have sex fucking everywhere.
After seeing all of the pics during the trial, all I could think was "her vagina doesn't look THAT dangerous"
Of all the things that can be stripped of me i'll be damned if it's my vanity
when I die covered in cocaine, hookers, and tequila at 73 years old just remember that I once had a tweet with that many retweets
We were banging then all I remember is coming down hard and smashing my top teeth off his forehead. I just rolled off and tapped out. Done-zo
Some dude just said my hair smells like his pillows
Do you know how awkward it is to get a dick pic while working at babies r us?
Apparently, im the only one in the world who thinks Larry King is hot.
The boob job was worth every penny just to see the expression of pure joy on his face the first time he saw them.
You were leaning against a fire hydrant asking people if they wanted to buy free pocket peanuts from you.
So I just accidentally joined a bar crawl and got a free shotski of Jameson. I love life.
Randomize
