Kiss
Puke
You were so drunk that some guy dressed as Harry Potter pointed his wand at you and screamed "Accio SHITSHOW"
There is no excuse for watching a Jesse McCartney movie.
Just stole a pregnancy test from Wegmans because I didn't want to pay 13 dollars to find out my life is over.
He made off the wall shots in beer pong, stuck the girls dog in a cooler, and played with swords with her mom. I wish I got his name
Nothing like moscato in your sinuses tobmake your night complete
No I got myself stoned. With her bowl. She was just a casualty of the War on Sobriety.
Lol i have proven this trip that I can meet a chick and fuck her within 72 hours no matter where she lives
Just wait til you visit, there will be an endless supply of fresh dick for your demand #economics
I just used bulldog clips for nipple clamps. Also, a wooden spoon as a paddle. DYI Domination or Ghetto Bondage?
I guess I look like the kind of girl who would buy edible, weed-infused lube.
apparently when a guy says "if there's anything missing in your life, I will provide" he's not expecting attractive lesbians to be the answer.
You what they say. One dick in the hand is better than two in the bush
I asked her how many times she came and she said "Oh god I can't count that high, Rutgers doesn't teach us that."
2015 is the year I FINALLY ALMOST had enough dick to satisfy me.
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