I just saw a hot homeless man
Cool, see you soon... she just admitted to her friends that it was a queef.
alright so where did all these fingerpaintings on my bedroom wall come from?
dude. you drew those with your dick
I'm currently using two paint brushes as chopsticks to eat lasagna.... college.
Im thinking about quitting weed for my dog
You destroyed the landscape if my vagina FOREVER.
I'm just high and in my robe and I would suck a dick for some pizza rolls. I can't talk about your problems right now
I'm going to shower the piss off me now. I feel like I was in an R. Kelly dream.
I've just stalked all the hot guys who have clicked "attending". I now know which guys are "yes", "maybe" and "no". I only hope my drunk self remembers.
I feel like just to watch it, I need to be high. To understand it, I'd need enough drugs to kill an elephant.
Ahh good point. I got some interesting mental pics and I'm slowly entering a "fuck it, lets do weird shit" phase sexually, but you may have already figured that out since I've been fucking you sideways and upside down a lot lately.
I threw up a lot of peanut butter last night.
Who would you rather hang with tonight, drunk me or high me?
Really need a jack off emoji
Who do we write to about that?
im about to bake her parents a "thank you for making such beautiful babies, ive had sex with all 5 of them" cake
Randomize
