i woke up convinced that my room was backwards i tried to go into the closet to get outta my room
I decided to follow my clitoris instead of my heart.
I tried to explain to him that we just wanted a stereotypical black friend to be in our group. He didn't take it too well... Never take me to the bar again.
He told me I took off my shirt, asked for the latino thunder and jumped on him. I want to question this but it sounds too much like me.
let's remember the whole point of NYE: to drink antisocial amounts of antisocial drinks, become incoherent, ruin a carpet, talk to a tree, wake up with head sellotaped to toilet. The where/how is superfluous, my vote goes to a cupboard and a bottle of jaeger Questions?
There has to be a way to make college graduation in Las Vegas different than any other Tuesday in Las Vegas. Strippers? Been there. Getting arrested for public indecency on the strip? Done that.
I couldn't find my shirt this morning so I stole one from his eight year old sister. Slutted up my outfit quite a bit.
I hate that you live in a gated community. I feel your guard judges me every time I go to your house at 3 am an leave at 5am
Maybe her vagina is like a vacuum
I can't decide if that would be a good or bad thing. I'm leaning toward good
Due to certain anatomical proportions it was less like fucking and more like childbirth.
we had break-up sex in a port-a-potty. how do you think it went?!
After you puked in the bathtub you claimed you were never eating quesadillas again and you never even ate a quesadilla
It must have been good head...he put down the Xbox controller
I now know he's been cheating for a while. I also know HER name, address, phone number, Facebook account, religion and zodiac sign. I feel like I'm earning my restraining order. Point is, never fuck over a librarian.
He talked me out going to the bar. No one ever talks me out going to the bar..this is fucking love.
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