who do you think you are?
someone who doesn't ask that question
hey no worries the mystery has been solved- i jst sneezed and my undies popped outta my nose.
If a woman tells you she has been pink socked...don't move forward with her.
You and i never got to the, we dont care what we look like friend-stage. you know? like not brushing your teeth stage.
sorry im really high
Do you feel like you missed out a little from not getting crabs in college?
until you tell me otherwise ill assume we're playing "cavity search" the homeland security game to spice up our sex life
we used the bottom of a tampon for coke since no one had a 20 on them. My life has resisted to this.
Between the plague n the counterfeit drugs we brought back from mexico I'm not thinking too highly of their country right now. Screw mexican homeless men.
I can't believe I've come to a point in my life where sex for a birthday present is acceptable
THESE BITCHES NOT IN MY MAJOR BETTER NOT FILL UP MY SLAVIC FAIRYTALES CLASS
Oh I was gonna ask you the same thing...? It's official ask anyone to see your husbands dick day.
Yes. He better. Or I will shave a penis into his beard while he sleeps.
They found me wandering around campus screaming body shots over and over again wrapped in a curtain
I volunteer to be the person who breaks into the room and runs around naked and has to be escorted out by police.
Hey I just woke up in the back of a pickup truck parked at taco bell... Can u come get me?
Randomize
