I bet he comes in French.
I'm using the size of your dick as a guage to see how big something is on Amazon. Any questions?
I now own a bag of cigarettes and have no purse, awesome
Well u missed Autumn's newly 21 yrs old sister flashing her tits and standing on the bar last night.
yeah dropping that class because i really don't want to be known as the girl who fell asleep in class and threw up as she walked out for an entire semester
I feel like an elephant shit on me and left me to be miserable
Would "deck the halls with penises " be an appropriate event title? I know peni is the plural but flow of the tongue as well
i would compare it to sliding down a velcro-covered fireman's pole naked. no more bearded men for me.
You declared your undying love to a drag queen, then proceeded to puke into the poor man's purse.
There is nothing worse then the feeling after you've held in farts all night..
What's his name?
I'm sorry I threw a frog in your car last night.
Things were going really well until his cousin showed up. She told him I look kind of like his mom, which started a ten-minute debate on my and his mother's specific features, and ultimately, who is prettier. Guess who my date picked.
i thought this was a perfectly normal conversation between two adult men about why this children's cartoon is quality television but no you just gotta be talking shit again
11:30 you texted me saying he was on his way. 11:37 you said, "Oh my God that was terrible."
Yeaaaaa...im super disgusted with myself lol...which is interesting, considering all of the things I have done in my life...
Randomize
